Dihydrogen Monoxide Vessels with Bernoulli Based Tubes
Many people have stated that I should have my water bottle with straw patented. Now I don’t know much about patent law but I don’t think I can necessarily patent combined technologies – though the pen clock would lead me to think otherwise. Anyway, here are some instructions to make your very own Nalgene water bottle with a Camelbak straw.
First, remove the cap from your Nalgene. I know, this process is so very difficult. Next, take something pointy and poke a hole in the center of the lid. The first time I did this, I used a drill and a drill bit. The second time I made one I used the awl from my Victorinox Soldier. Point being, it doesn’t matter how you do it but you need to put a hole in the lid that is a little smaller than the Camelbak tube.
Next and possibly finally put the straw in the hole. Fathers, if you’re making this with a son or sons now would be a good time to have the birds and the bees talk with your sons. The straw and hole make a lot more sense than the birds and bees. Seriously what do birds and bees do with each other?
The previous step I said might be your last step. I said this because if you made the hole the right size then a seal will be formed ergo preventing the bottle from leaking. If you made the hole too big then you will be required to epoxy it. Well, I guess you are not required to epoxy it, but you’ll end up a lot less wet if you do.
Additionally, I recommend you add some cool decorations so you know that the bottle is yours because clearly a straw sticking out of the top of it won’t narrow it down. A racing strip will make it go faster so that is recommended. Flame decals are cool too though I added this sticker.
Anyway, there you go. You now have the ability to drink from a sealed bottle via a straw.
Nalgene Bottle: 8 dollars
Replacement Camelbak Straw: 6 Dollars
Ability to drink from a straw: Priceless
There are some things money can buy, for everything else there’s a nerd able to provide a set of instructions.